Elizabeth Drakes's Site

Fantasy Romance

Vacation

Writing: Why Vacations Are No Longer “Catch-Up Time”

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We just recently got back from vacation. Once upon a time, a vacation from work was a relaxing time, a time I could catch up on my writing, maybe even get a little bit ahead. We’d have things planned, of course, and spontaneous things would come up, but there always seemed to be plenty of time to get in a few thousand more words.

Then we had kids.

familyvacation
And I have to people. *shudders*

 

I had thought the four day weekend we had for the Fourth of July or the week of vacation we took would give me some time to work on my writing and maybe do a few other things like update my mailing list. We had quite a bit of time after all. Sure, we had things planned, like a small cook-out with close family and a larger graduation party for my niece. I already had the food planned, and I had selected tasty things with minimal prep. The gift was already purchased. And yes, we were taking the kids to a water park. Wait, what do you mean my expectations weren’t realistic?

But I hadn’t figured that one or the other of my children would want to snuggle the entire vacation. And by snuggle, I mean never leave my side. Even in ninety degree weather.

parentspersonalspace
Can we be any closer, momma?

While this is a gift, and I like snuggling them, by day two, I am getting a bit annoyed. Snuggling literally means they sit on me. Both of them. At the same time. While still cute, they are a lot bigger and heavier than they were. And they squirm. And wriggle. And try to steal more real estate on my lap from each other until they both get tossed off.

And there comes a point where I simply want my space back.

And writing does not happen when there is snuggling. Most of the time, writing doesn’t happen when they are awake and in the house. My oldest one is an avid reader, and despite her age, she can and will read over my shoulder as I am typing. Yeah, not cool, especially if I am “in the zone” and don’t see her right away as I don’t write “closed door” romance.

Reading doesn’t usually happen, either. I don’t read “closed door” romance, either.

MomVacationReading

While I wouldn’t trade these days for the world, I do need to adjust my expectations.

Vacation doesn’t mean what it used to, and if I still want time to write every day, I am going to have to get up at 5am like it’s a work day.

Not that I want to get up at 5am. If left to my own devices, I wouldn’t go to bed until well after midnight then sleep in every morning. But that hasn’t been my life since college. The one and only time my natural sleep cycle meshed with my obligations.

I wish I were a morning person.

5 Things I Learned about Myself on Vacation

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I wouldn’t say learned, exactly, but perhaps was strongly reminded of in a less than subtle way.

5 Things I Learned about Myself on Vacation

 

  1. I Like Need Things Planned

This whole going with the flow thing is for people that are not me. I need to know what we’re doing and when. I want plans solidified. Train schedules plotted out. Museum hours accounted for. Not, this doesn’t apply to my writing, but it does everything else (which is why it still stymies me as to why I can’t be a plotter).

familyvacation

 

  1. I Like (Need) Things to Be on Time

In my family, if you’re not five minutes (okay, fifteen) early, you’re late. Why yes, my ancestors are German, why do you ask? I try very hard to be on time and ready to go, which I accomplished all the time every time before we had children. Now, I feel like I have to tell everyone we need to leave thirty minutes sooner than we actually do just to have a chance at leaving on time.

And when we’re late anyway? Plans start to fall apart.

Time
What did people do before watches and cell phones?

 

  1. Crowds Make Me Edgy

I don’t like crowds. I’ve never liked crowds. Most of my life, I’ve been content to shop first thing in the morning to avoid crowds. Then, internet shopping became a thing, and I could shop whenever I liked without having to talk to a soul.

But every single thing that involves a family vacation also seems to avoid crows. Lots of them.

51acb30ac6516d3bff4e7061ecfab48d_online-shopping-funniest-memes-online_420-294

 

  1. I Am Not Pleasant When Stressed

Who is, really? And no, breathing techniques don’t work.

stressed

 

  1. Stress Causes Migraines

And these make me even more pleasant! What was the point of this vacation again?

 

4 Reasons Why My WIP Isn’t Done

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I was supposed to have the first draft of my current WIP with Sir Gabriel done last week. It isn’t.

Why, you ask?

4 Reasons Why My WIP Isn’t Done

 

1. Technical Issues

I updated my computer to the latest update in Windows 10. At that point, all bets were off. When I tried to open the Word App, the computer decided to type 4 repeatedly so I couldn’t access any apps. Then, the cursor decided to move backwards one letter at a time. Good times.

Windows10
Real footage.

How did I solve it? I still don’t know. Which means if it comes back, I don’t know how to fix it.

 

2. We Decided Child 1’s Room Looked So Great, Let’s Tackle Child 2’s!

I wish I was joking. We have taken out all of the furniture and are painting the trim. We bought the paint for the walls today.  Seriously, I don’t know what’s wrong with us.

 

3. Dance Recital

No, I did not take up dance. But let me tell you how much time a dance recital your child is in consumes. You must take them in for pictures and final costume touch-ups. Then comes dress rehearsal, wherein you will spend 45 minutes in the car, after leaving work early, to pick them up and cart them two towns over to the auditorium at which they’ll perform. Then, you get to spend another 45 minutes in the car going home. All for them to have 5 minutes on stage.

This does not include attending the recital itself. It was over 4 hours last year. Enough parents fussed that they added another show and reduced the run time to 3 hours. Yeah. 3 hours. My kid’s dance was 2 minutes and 15 seconds.

dance1
All the dads.

3. Planning for Vacation

We’re taking a family vacation. That means I have to get done all of the work I would during the time I’m taking off before I leave. Because that’s what vacation means, right?

 

4. New Video Game

It’s sad to admit, but we got a new video game. It’s really just hack and slash, but we’re playing it as a family and having fun. It’s hard to be the odd-one-out when the whole family is cheering and playing.

 

Yes, I am serious about publishing that book in September. And yes, I am serious about 3 books next year. Just a little more paint on the wall. Or another round of Hyrule Warriors. Promise!

Now, the Letdown

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It’s that time after the holiday season that I dislike the most. It’s still dark, cold, and snowy. But now, it’s just winter.

Christmas is over, New Year’s is done. The eggnog is gone. It’s time to be done celebrating and move on to the grind of January.

From this:
lights
Pretty lights!

 

To this:
trees
Only looks pretty until you have to drive in it.

 

Even the holiday lights don’t look the same. They’re still pretty and help brighten the darkness, but each day, there are fewer and fewer up as people accept that the season is over and take down theirs.

There’s no anticipation brewing.

No excitement as we wrap presents eager to see the joy on the receivers’ face when they get them. No expectation of what’s under the tree for us. Not even the anticipation of a few days off of work.

Just snow. Darkness. Cold. And long hours at the day job.

funny-go-work-dark-home-pics
Sums it up.

 Oh, and taking down the Christmas tree. Because that’s always a fun job I look forward to doing. *end sarcasm*

I wish I could schedule a holiday in late January or early February so we’d have something to look forward to, but it’s really hard for me to get time off before April 15th.

In a few weeks, I won’t notice. I’ll be head down, getting work done as we dig out of the snow and cold to get to work on a daily basis.

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Actual winter footage.

It’ll be the grind of obligations and doing what needs to be done.

And, it’ll suck.

The song about how the singer wishes every day would be Christmas would ruin Christmas, but I do wish we could stretch out the holidays a bit. Maybe exchange our New Year for the Chinese New Year so we have something to look forward to after Christmas. The next holiday on the horizon in Easter if you celebrate it, otherwise, we’re looking at Memorial Day. That’s just too long.

How about you? Do you feel post-Christmas blues? If so, how do you deal with them?

How Much Progress Can You Lose?

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How much progress can you lose in a few weeks. All right, okay, a month?

A lot, as it turns out.

Vacation, kids, just being lazy, and trying a couch to 5k program got in the way of strength training. I never did figure out how to merge a couch to 5k program into my strength training routine. So, as I started working on the 5k, I fell off the strength training wagon.

For a month.

Yeah, I didn’t realize it had been that long, but as I looked at my log that listed the last day I had trained, it was undeniable.

So, I knew I’d have to ease back from where I was. I just didn’t realize how far I’d have to ease back. Or how much I’d hurt the next day.

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I so thought I was over each step I took reminding me I’d overdone it the day before, like when I first started strength training.

See, I try hard not to overdo it in these sessions. I have a day job that requires concentration if not physical exertion, and pain makes it hard to concentrate. I also have two amazing but rambunctious kids that demand my attention. And, I hate asking my husband to run down to the basement to bring up the clothes because my legs have the consistency of jelly or my arms can barely lift a pencil.

Granted, I’m not that bad this time. Okay, I did ask him to bring up the laundry, but I could lift more than pencil.

As I revitalize the routine, I find myself going through another case of the “I’m so hungry I’ll even eat peas” phase. That says something as I can’t stand peas. They’re all wrinkly, and they smell like dirty feet while they cook. Snow peas or pea pods, those are a whole different food stuff. We eat those like they’re candy in our house.

w3

Not sure how long it’ll take me to get back to where I was a month ago. Hoping only a few weeks, but it’s so hard to tell. I’m getting older, and my body is letting me know. I finally broke down and bought compression socks to help with the ankle I broke last year. Probably going to need a compression sleeve for at least one knee. Not so much for the strength training, but practicing for a 5k has been murder on that ankle I broke, especially.

*sigh*  I can’t be a twenty-something forever. And while I’d love the body of my twenty-something self, not sure I’d be willing to trade my wisdom and self-esteem for that body.

progress

How about you? Do you find that a month away from something makes you worse at it? If so, how long does it take you recoup lost ground? If you don’t get worse at it, do you have a secret you can share as to how you manage it?

Beach Reading Without Getting “The Look”

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I want to be reading more, but it’s been a hectic summer with all the activities for the kids, DH having a much heavier than normal work schedule, and events for family and friends. Our vacation was less than spectacular, and we failed to potty train DD2 during it.

Now that summer is in its last throws and we’re gearing up for school to start, we’re taking one last long weekend. I haven’t gotten in much reading this last month with everything else going on, so I want to pack some beach reading.

vacation2
What I plan to be doing. Wishful thinking with a toddler, I know.

This means no iPad. While I do really like my iPad, it doesn’t like sand or water. And, it’s pretty tough to read in direct sunlight.

So, I have to find some actual, real paper books. I have mixed feelings on this. See, I love holding a real paper book in my hands. There’s just something about it I enjoy.

What I don’t enjoy is the traditional half-naked romance cover. On the beach. With the kids. And all the other snickers from family that come with it. Invariably, someone comments on it.

DevilinWinter
So, even dressed, still obvious.

I don’t *hide* that I love reading romances, though most people don’t think I’m your typical romance reader. They’d be wrong, as demographically, I fit the profile perfectly.

The iPad hides this cover beautifully, and no one ever need know I’m reading either a bit of Regency, a retelling of a fairy-tale, or if I’m really lucky, a love story with dragons instead of the Economist.

I wish Amazon sold romance books with an optional hide-what-I’m-reading cover. Make it a plain and boring cover without eve a title. Or a title like Complete History of the Napoleonic War. So us Regency readers know exactly what that means, but the rest of the beach can be blissfully unaware.

I don’t know why DH can bring a book with space ships and laser battles on the front, and no one looks twice. But a half-dressed hot guy and suddenly it’s nothing but snickers.

Stross
A book by DH’s favorite author. Less clothes than the romance novel, still gets fewer comments.

Oh well. Maybe I’ll have to borrow one of his space ship books. He’s been trying to get me to read more than the one book I did by Charles Stross anyway.

 

How about you? How do you read at the beach? Or on vacation? Do you prefer to read on an electronic device or a book? If you read romance, do you have any tricks to disguising your reading fare? Or maybe you just don’t care? Or maybe your family is less prone to teasing you?