It’s October, and many of my friends and neighbors are decorating for Halloween.
When I was a kid, I freakin’ loved Halloween! I would totally plan out my costume and let my imagination run. My mom did stop me from wearing my Wonder Woman underoos out in 30 degree weather (I wanted to be Wonder Woman for most of childhood years, but we lived in very cold places). My parents didn’t really get into making Halloween costumes, and the store bought Halloween costumes of the 1980s were awful . . .
But man, when I dressed up like Batman, I felt so cool. And yeah, my Batman costume looked a lot like that Darth Vader one. But without the light saber.
My favorite year was the year I dressed up like a queen and got to wear a fancy party dress and a Burger King crown covered in glitter. I thought I was all that. My mom even let me wear a little of her lipstick. I truly felt royal.
Now that I’m older, however, Halloween has become a season to endure. Here are the top 6 reasons why Halloween changed for me:
- I Hate Scary Things – No scary movies, scary dolls, or haunted houses for me. I hate being scared, and more than that, I hate the nightmares it brings. Usually for weeks. I chalk this up to the over-active imagination that so many writers have. And, of course, to being a coward. As an adult, trying to avoid scary things during this time of year is always problematic. Doable, but only if you don’t channel surf. Never, ever channel surf during Halloween.
- Halloween Candy Is Not Longer Awesome – It’s no longer about making sure you hit the houses that give the best candy, then sorting through it and setting aside the chocolate while pawning off the candy corn to the one person in the world who’ll eat it. I know candy isn’t good for me, and I no longer have the metabolism of an eight-year-old to ignore that fact. I have also learned that if something is in the house, I will probably “forget” this and eat it. So, we don’t regularly have chips, candy, or junk food in the house. Except at Halloween.
- Gotta share – And if I’m caught eating a piece of candy, DD1 and DD2 each need a piece of that candy. And neither of them can hold their sugar. Minutes after having said piece of candy, both are running around like someone lit their hair on fire. Usually whooping and screaming as if the aforementioned fire had indeed been lit. To which DH gives me a look that says he knows what happened and that the current insanity is totally and fully my fault.
- See #3 every time DD1 or DD2 gets a piece of Halloween candy they got trick-or-treating
- Can’t Take DD1 to Certain Stores – I have to be super careful of what stores I go in during this season and where we go in those stores. DD1 will cautiously peek down Home Depot’s aisles at the animatronics and ask me to repeatedly reassure her nothing is real. She still refuses to set foot in a certain store that scared her two years ago. I don’t know how she remembers anything from being that young, but boy does she. She still points at the store and calls it the “scary place”. We haven’t shopped there since the crying, screaming hysterics when a grim reaper went off as we came through the entrance (and yes, it was her, not me).
- Can’t Take DD1 Past Certain Houses – One of our neighbors is very festive. They have an amazing Christmas display that is only rivaled by their Halloween display. Which has led me to needing to find creative ways around their house as DD1 flips out every time we drive past.
- DD1 Yells at Halloween Decorations – In her loudest possible voice. In the middle of the street as we’re taking a walk. In the middle of the sidewalk outside a shop. Or in the stores themselves. Things like: “I’m not afraid of you!” or “You don’t scare me!” Some people laugh. Some people stare. I just keep waiting for November 1st and the Santa decorations.