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Tidying Up

February 14, 2019 by Elizabeth Drake

A co-worker recommended I check out the show Tidying Up with Marie Kondo. It’s on Netflix, so I have access to it, and it’s something the kids can watch even if they don’t want to.

tidykidsroom.jpg
So all of our kids’ rooms can look like this.

So, I popped it on one Friday night when I was feeling stressed and not really up to anything too gripping, but I also wanted a bit of something on while I went about the evening.

It was an interesting take on tidying.

This isn’t the kind of show you watch for hugely dramatic results. But it does have some interesting lessons.

If you aren’t already familiar, the concept starts with piling like things together then deciding what to keep based on what “sparks joy”.

This is supposed to be done mostly alone so family biases don’t sway your perception of joy. Also, you are supposed to touch things, to let yourself feel the joy.

Deceptively simple.

This forces people to often confront mountains of possessions, particularly clothes, as you round up all like things in the entire house and pile them together. Makes me cringe a little as I know I also own too many clothes.

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Good thing my books are on my Kindle or my house would look like this.

It also addresses the concept of sunk cost and helps people get past it.

I deal with this from time to time in my day job. For example, a machine we bought is operating sub optimally. When we evaluate replacing it, we do not look at the purchase price of that machine. We look at the cost of the new alternatives before us and what each of those alternatives will give us for the cost of the alternative.

If we put this into practice in our personal life, we should ignore the $500 price tag on the pair of shoes that hurt our feet and we never wear. Instead, we should be asking ourselves if those shoes “spark joy”. If they don’t (and it’s highly doubtful they do), out they go!

envy2
Because those were never comfortable.

Perhaps more interesting is how the tidying process deals with the way we value our possessions as part of ourselves. This manifests in a difficult to get rid of things because they mean more to us simply because they are our things. For example, there have been  studies done showing that if there are two identical mugs, and one mug is ours, we put more value on that mug.

This method deals with overcoming that value so we can part with things in a beautiful and graceful way.

Rather than simply tossing the things out, you tell them goodbye and thank them for their service. You then wish them well on their journey.

Maybe it sounds a little hokey written down here, but I watched her tell people to be gentle with things that were meaningful. To say their goodbyes. It felt kind and accepting of the emotion attached.

Overall, the show is interesting, but I don’t have the six months recommended to tidy my home, not with everything else going on. Still, the show did inspire me to tackle a small corner of my closet. I have a feeling if you are good at thrifting, now would be a spectacular time to be shopping!

I never thought of myself as much of a saver, but I will say that thanking something and saying goodbye, then carefully folding it up to send it on its journey made it easier to say goodbye to the next item and the next item after that.

I didn’t need the emotional fortitude to part part with half my dress pants after the dress code change at work six months ago, but I still had the bathrobes I’d worn when I had infants to nurse. I haven’t worn them in over five years, but for some reason, it was still hard to say goodbye.

But I thanked them and wished them well on their way.

And I feel better for it.

Filed Under: Organizing Tagged With: Books, clothes, Goodbye, grateful, Kids, Organized, Sparks joy, Stressed, Sunk cost, Tidying, Tidying Up

New Years Resolutions 2019

December 20, 2018 by Elizabeth Drake

Another New Year’s Resolution post!

res1

I am trying really hard to set realistic goals this year. And I am going to check in on them quarterly.

 

My 2019 Resolutions:

1. Release Two Books This Year

Yes, I know we’d talked about three. But as long as I have a day job, I just don’t see that being realistic. I’d rather put out two books that I’m proud of than three that I think are only okay.

 

2. Write Three First Drafts

I’ve admitted that I spend a lot more time editing than writing, and that’s okay. BUT I need to make sure I always have a fresh supply of material to edit. The longer I spend time editing, the harder actually writing new material becomes. So this still needs to be a focus for me.

 

3. Eat food before it goes bad.

Didn’t see that one coming, did you? Our refrigerator is a black hole, and too often stuff goes in and I don’t find it until it’s sporting a mold colony. By eating what we buy, it saves us money and reduces our environmental footprint. We have a new, smaller, refrigerator. While it may seem counter-intuitive, I am hoping not being able to store as much and seeing more of it will help us achieve this goal.

 

4. Move at Least Three Days a Week

Walking. Biking. Whatever. Three days a week. This is a lot more doable since my office put in a small but very nice gym in the basement for employees. They even put in showers! I have already been working towards this goal, but I am adding it as I want to keep it at the forefront of my thoughts.

 

5. Keep a Food Journal

It’s hard to know what to change in your eating habits until you truly know what you are eating. I have a Fitbit I wear daily. It comes with a tracking program on the same app. I have tried to use it with varying degrees of success. I need to develop the habit of logging food, and that’s what this resolution is all about!

 

How about you? What are your resolutions? Have you started on them? Do you think you’re likely to keep them?

Filed Under: Resolutions Tagged With: Books, Eating Healthy, editing, exercise, First Draft, Food, journal, Move, New Year, New Year's Resolutions, Writing

6 Reasons I Dislike Audio Books

February 13, 2018 by Elizabeth Drake

While I do love audio books, as I mentioned here, there are some things I don’t like about them, especially as I’ve been reading more of them.

Here are six reasons why.

 

Six Reasons I Don’t Like Audio Books

 

1. If I Miss Something, Going Back is a Pain

At least on my iPod (which is pretty ancient), it isn’t easy to go back a little to catch something I missed. And I do miss stuff as I’m usually listening while I’m doing something else (laundry, dishes, vacuuming). This tends to means I just miss stuff.

ipodmeme
Ipod still works and still plays audio books!

 

2. I Don’t Get as Much of the Story

I’m a visual learner. I’m mostly lucky that way as so much of our education system is designed for visual learners, but this does mean that I simply don’t process as much of the story listening to it as I would if I read it.

 

3. I Don’t Learn as Much

Reading is very enjoyable, but it also helps teach me to be a better writer. While the audio version still helps me with plot, pacing, and character development, it does a lot less for helping be get better at the mechanics of words on a page.

 

4. Sometimes I Don’t Want Expensive Electronic Devices with Me

You need electronics to play an audio book. As I get most of my audio books through Audible, I need a device to play it on. That means taking care of that device. Making sure you charged it the night before. Making sure you don’t drop it while on the treadmill. Making sure you’re careful with it while doing household chores.

Maybe I need to get some earbuds with memory built right into them. Does such a thing even exist? We live in the future with self-driving cars that talk to us (sarcastically if you have an iCar). It must exist. Though this would make going back to get catch up on the stuff I missed even harder.

Meme7BatteryBackup
Back when devices stayed charged.

5. Annoying Narrator

Nothing worse than buying an audible book, and five minutes in, all you want is for the narrator to shut up because their voice is even more annoying than your whining toddler. This has happened to me. Twice.

 

6. Expense

Audible books are a lot more expensive than traditional ebooks. This means fewer books for the same budget, and that’s never good.

 

While I love audio books, there are also some serious drawbacks. I will still be reading the majority of books the old-fashioned way on my iPad.

How about you? Anything you dislike about audio books? Any tricks to keeping devices charged?

Filed Under: Books, Uncategorized Tagged With: audible books, Audio Books, Books, Romance, Romance Novel, Romance Writer

5 Reasons I Love Audio Books

February 6, 2018 by Elizabeth Drake

The number of audio books out there continues to grow, and Amazon has made it easier than ever to get them. Even my library has audio romance title that I can borrow.

Here are five reasons I love audio books.

 

1. Vacuuming Has Never Been Done More Often

Or any household task, really. Popping in my earbuds and working on laundry, cleaning the bathroom, or tidying the living room means more time listening to a book.

audiobookmeme1
Suddenly a more vacuumed house!

2. Long Car Rides Suck Less

I do not like long car rides, however, an audio book can make them more enjoyable. The first time I ever listened to an audio book we were driving out to rural Ohio to visit family. I’m sure if you have a long commute, this would be a good way to spend it.

 

3. Excercising becomes More Enjoyable

One of the things I hate about exercising is the excruciating boredom. I know this doesn’t affect everyone. Some people even enjoy exercising. *shudders*  But that’s not me. And while I will never enjoy my time on a treadmill or the elliptical, there was more than one day this week that the temperatures didn’t get above 0F/-18C with the windchill.

That requires indoor exercise. However, going down to the basement where we positioned a big screen TV in front of the treadmill and elliptical almost always results in the kids coming down with me and an episode of My Little Ponies or Octonauts on the screen. Not exactly something that takes my mind off the boredom. An audio book helps.

cardiomeme
How many of us feel about cardio.

4. Making Children’s Sleep Issues More Tolerable

Our youngest child has some sleep issues, and she struggles with falling asleep. Getting her more tired doesn’t work. Warm milk doesn’t work (assuming you can get her to drink it). She never consumes caffeine and gets very little processed sugar. The doctor says some kids are like that, especially kids that have suffered from night terrors. If we actually want her to sleep, we need to sit with her until she falls asleep. That can mean up to an hour of sitting in a darkened room. Yeah, audio books help.

 

5. British Accents

Lots of the books I’ve listened to are narrated by people with British accents. Yeah, enough said.

 

How about you? Do you listen to audio books? Do you enjoy them? Anything you like about them? Maybe something you don’t like?

 

 

Filed Under: Books Tagged With: Audio Books, Books, Reading, romance author, Romance Novels

Progress Update

January 31, 2018 by Elizabeth Drake

Thought I’d share a quick update as to how my quest to get a book on your e-reader is going.

images (1)
Truth!

Pro Writing Aid

I bought Pro Writing Aid to do a final polish on what I thought was a tidy manuscript. I figured it would take a few hours to go through and make any changes. Okay, stop laughing.

Yes, I have lots of red errors of doom.

ProWritingAid
Yeah, lotta red.

I’m working through them, though after a few chapters, I’m learning I don’t always agree with all of their marks. For example, it tells me the word desire is “corporate”. But I’m a romance author, and this word is common in the genre.

I’m picking which reports work best for me and working through their recommendations, but this has already taken longer than a few hours.

More Edits

As I’m re-reading everything, I’m making changes. I know, but I can’t help myself. As I work on the technical side of my writing, I also find myself rewriting descriptions to make things flow better, revamping dialogue and the like.

I’ve been working on this novel for two years, and I can still find things to change. I’m starting to worry it’ll never be done.

editing
Starting to feel like this is me.

Cover Artist

I do not have talent with drawing or photo-manipulation, and I know we all judge a book by its cover. So back in August, I reserved a spot with a cover artist I really like for late 2017 or early 2018. She recently said she could start working on mine in February, so I’m hoping her schedule sticks.

My goal is to work with the same artist for all of the books I’m writing so my covers have a consistent look. As you can see from my works in progress, I have a few coming.

If this cover goes well, I’m hoping to use her again.

Editor?

Given everything that Pro Writing Aid has unearthed about my writing, I am seriously considering an editor. I have learned the lesson about compound sentences needing a comma, and that shows in Pro Writing Aid, but I’m still not sure what a hidden verb is.

While I don’t think the book will ever earn back what I pay for an editor, the expense may still be worth it if I learn something from the process that I can apply to future novels. This means finding a solid editor that doesn’t mind romance writing, and who’ll take the work even at mac and cheese prices. So if you know of any, please let me know!

New Story

After having a discussion with my writing group, I decided to start a new work amidst all of these revisions so I don’t lose the ability (and desire) to create something new. Rewriting is important, but so is creating.

 My goal is still to release To Love a Prince by the end of June 2018. Yes, I’m putting that out there. I’d like to have the next book ready by January 2019, but that’s still in the early stages of revision. Chronologically, it comes after To Love a Prince, but I wrote three other books before that one. I have some catching up to do if I’m going to be ready by then!

Filed Under: Uncategorized, Writing Tagged With: Book cover, Books, editing, editor, Romance Novels, Romance Writer, Writing

What I Really Want

November 3, 2017 by Elizabeth Drake

I’ve been reading a lot of craft books. Things that tell me books should be all about plot, and tension, and making characters miserable until the very end. But maybe, just maybe, that’s not what I want to read.

isthisakissingbook.jpg
Please let it be a kissing book!

Yeah, I know. Kind of a revelation to me, too.

But the deal is life has been pretty stressful.

There’s hurricanes like Irma and Harvey, issues with North Korea, Las Vegas shootings, NYC terrorist attacks, trade concerns, Russia investigations, debt ceilings, border walls, and whatever else is gobbling up the news. It feels like a constant stream of ugliness and negativity. Maybe it’s always been there, and I was better at not noticing.

There’s family and work and health issues and . . . Well, you get the idea. You probably suffer from all of it, too.

So maybe, just maybe, when I slip into a fictional world, I’m not looking for heart wrenching agony. I’m not looking for Game of Thrones level treachery, betrayal, and angst. Maybe, I just want a nice romance with a few obstacles to overcome and then a happily-ever-after.

kindle

Yeah, that’s kinda ugly to admit. But it’s true.

I have a rather large stack of books to read. Most of them romance, so I should get my happily-ever-after. Yet, I don’t want to read about a lot of things in them. I never have the stomach for rape. I’m really not looking for characters that keep making bad choices as we watch the suspense build.

I don’t really want to be on the edge of my seat. I just don’t have it in me to care. Or, if I do care, I’d rather save it for something else.

I want to slip into a book and let it be a nice ride. Give me some bumps and challenges to overcome, but that lets me escape into it. I don’t find fear or horror relaxing. Or suffering.

gotd

While maybe it’s not good storytelling and doesn’t follow the rules of craft, this is what I want right now. What I’ve been reading. What entertains me. And for me, that’s all that matters at the moment.

Maybe I’m alone. And that’s okay. It won’t be the first time, and it won’t be the last.

 

How about you? Ever find yourself too wrung out for high-intensity fiction? Am I the only one that watches reruns of Bob Ross to relax some evenings?

Filed Under: Entertainment, Uncategorized Tagged With: Books, fear, Game of Thrones, horror, kindle, relax, Romance, Romance Novels, suspense, want to relax, What we Want

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